Dokei to Dokei
by Felicity Dream
Summary: Enji had accepted a life without a Soulmate. And then he had one. But he doesn't think he really wants her, when he can keep remembering the dead look to Rei's eyes as she continued living without hers. That's not what he wanted ever. But his Soulmate is persistent and magnetic, and sometimes the thought of a Soulmate might not be so bad... fem!Izuku/EnDeku, Soulmate AU.


Disclaimer: Of course I don't own My Hero Academia, its characters, or the franchise.  
Story: Enji had accepted a life without a Soulmate. And then he had one. But he doesn't think he really wants her, when he can keep remembering the dead look to Rei's eyes as she continued living without hers. That's not what he wanted ever. But his Soulmate is persistent and magnetic, and sometimes the thought of a Soulmate might not be so bad..  
Set as a Soulmate AU, and probably diverging from the Sports Festival on (and some differences in canon).  
Spoilers: No, not really?  
Warnings: Age disparity, maybe future situations if this is continued.  
Pairings: Fem!Izuku/Endeavor

 **Dokei to Dokei**

He had a Soulmate. For as long as he lived, he'd never had one in an age where all the world had one and how important it was to have a Soulmate, even if you never meet them.

That's fine, he told himself angrily while erasing the words off his skin back then. He didn't need one. He had to focus on his goal and he at least wouldn't be distracted with a Soulmate.

He still needed a partner though, so he eventually went out to find someone compatible with him and his Quirk. If a Soulmate match was impossible, a Quirk Marriage was logical. He'd specifically looked for others without a Soulmate (for any reason). While it was rare to have a similar case like his, there were others who had lost a Soulmate for some reason or other.

That was how he'd met Rei —beautiful, cold Rei who'd lost her Soulmate to some sort of accident and had the perfect Quirk to balance out his. He thought it was a sign.

 _ **(It wasn't.)**_

If she had never met her Soulmate, had never accepted the connection, had never consummated it in any way before he'd died…it would've been fine.

But they did and Enji married her.

 _ **(And nothing was fine.)**_

A broken Soulmate bond was never a good thing, but Enji hadn't of known or cared then. And now he was stuck with the consequences.

 _ **(She'd been dead inside and now he was too.)**_

But then one day, Enji had found words on his skin that hadn't been his and looked nothing like his writing.

 _Hello? My name is Izuku?_

It was sharp and precise. He'd stared for a good minute before he angrily found a pen to write with.

 _Where have you been?_

For a moment, he didn't receive an answer. Then he had —

 _School? I got back now. Kaa-san says I could write you now, since I can write better._

Enji froze.

 _How…_ He swallowed thickly, finishing the sentence on his arm. _How old are you?_

 _5_

Enji reeled back, dropping the pen. His Soulmate was a _child_.

He ignored the next messages, angrily erasing his off his arm. He rushed out of there, yelling for Shoto. His son sprinted towards his direction and he harshly grabbed his arm and dragged him to the training hall.

"O-Otou-san?"

 _ **(His Soulmate was the same age as his**_ _ **youngest**_ _ **son.)**_

In the training hall, he immediately went into a stance that his son clumsily copied. He counted to three and then rushed forwards. His son dodged well the first two times, but then was too close, unable to miss the hit to his gut. Shoto fell to his knees, immediately crying, and a pang of regret and guilt hit Enji. Then he shoved those feelings away, remembering how he'd trained worse with his own father. Shoto just needed to toughen up.

But then Rei appeared, rushing to Shoto's side. "Enji, please! Stop! You're being too harsh!"

 _ **(Dead, dead inside Rei, who was so cold but loved their children enough —but not enough when sometimes she felt nothing for Touya, Fuyumi, Natsuo and sometimes Shoto.)**_

He felt fury erupt in him and he raised his hand, watching his wife flinch, before a rush of worry that wasn't his flooded him. He stumbled back, looking away from his frightened wife and son, before turning and running away. He locked himself up in his room, clutching at his hair.

Was he really monstrous enough to strike his wife and son? Was he really that full of anger? God, where was his self-control?

 _ **(Gone because he was soulless and didn't deserve a Soulmate.)**_

The fact that he'd been angry enough that his Soulmate had felt it, despite their bond not supposed to be strong enough for it, said a lot about his anger. Seeing a pen on his bedside table, he hesitantly grabbed it and looked at his wrist.

 _Hello?_

 _Hi! If I was rude, I didn't mean it._

 _No…I was…surprised because you're a child._

 _Oh…How old are you?_

He stared at it.

 _ **(Old enough to be your father.)**_

He wrote _I have a wife and four kids already_ , letting the implications linger in the air.

For a few seconds, she didn't answer.

 _I hope they're nice and you love them._

Enji bit down on his lip and felt guilt and shame.

 _I haven't been the best to them._

 _Then do your best now._

Enji's hand shook. _I train my youngest too harshly and ignore my older kids._

 _Pay attention now and find other ways to train._

 _I almost hit my wife._

 _Did you?_

 _No._

 _Then don't._

A hysterical laugh choked out of him. She had a counter for everything.

 _Are you really 5?_

He wished that was a lie. A sketch began on his arm and he saw a messy doodle of _All Might_. Fucking bastard. His face was torn between a grimace and half-smile. He threw himself onto his bed and lay there.

* * *

Three days past. He hadn't really left his bed or moved out of his room. His Soulmate wrote to him all the time, but he didn't answer any more. He read every message, but he couldn't bring himself to answer back. Then on the morning of the fourth day, Rei entered his room. He turned from her, burying his face into his pillow.

"Enji? What's wrong? You've been locked up here, ever since…"

He flinched in remembrance, though he did move to hide his arm.

"Oh," he heard Rei say. "You talked to your Soulmate?" He didn't answer but her gentle hands took his arm. "You should be happy," she said softly, touching the words of his Soulmate.

"She's a child," he croaked out. He clenched his jaw before forcing himself to sit up. He glimpsed Shoto hiding by the door, watching with wide eyes. He looked at Rei then, swallowing harshly. "She told me she was 5."

"Oh, Enji…" Rei held his hand and squeezed. "At least you still have yours."

She gave him a broken smile and Enji inwardly shivered.

 _ **(Maybe that wasn't such a good thing.)**_

* * *

He continued to keep his distance, always reading but never writing back. That is until she wrote down only two words.

 _I'm sorry_.

Worried and panicked, he'd picked up a pen and started writing.

 _What's wrong?_

 _You…answered?_

 _Why would you apologize?_

 _I thought I was annoying you or something. You don't write back to me._

He flinched.

 _You're young. I'm…not._

 _I don't care. You're my Soulmate_ was what she replied back simply.

He found himself smiling. He couldn't remember the last time he did.

 _My name is Enji_ he finally told her.

She drew him a flower.

* * *

Over the years, he kept in contact with her. He heeded her advice, paying more attention to his older kids and spending more time with them. He let Shoto hang out with his siblings and changed their training routine, conditioning Shoto's body and mind when he was a little older and could handle it. He did his best to treat Rei better and be a little more understanding, and tried to help her when it was a little too much for her.

And when Izuku came crying to him, writing about this 'Kacchan', he felt angry and did his best to comfort her. When his Soulmate felt down from all the taunts —'They called me a Hero Slut again.' 'Just because your body's more mature and you love Heroes doesn't mean you are. Don't listen to those jealous bitches.' (He really did do his best to not curse around her.) —he scrambled around for all the right words to write to her.

Years past and this was how he stayed connected to his Soulmate.

They still didn't meet —she was still so young and he wasn't comfortable crossing that line…Not just because of her age, but also because he still wasn't able to accept what it meant to have a Soulmate.

 _ **(Rei's still destroyed from hers.)**_

Then one day, he felt utter despair hit him in the middle of a spar with Shoto and he was falling to his knees. His son's hands were on him, but he couldn't think past the feeling of all encompassing despair.

"Pen," he gasped, vision blurry. He felt one being shoved into his hand a moment later and he shakily started to write on his arm.

 _Are you okay?_

 _I'm Quirkless. Are you okay with that? w_ as the immediate reply.

He stared dumbly at his arm, but that took up too much time and there was a wave of despair even worse than before.

 _I was just shocked_ he hurriedly wrote. _And worried. You told me you wanted to be a Hero…_

The despair softened but still lingered. She didn't write back anything for a minute, fraying his nerves. But then…

 _Kacchan threw my notebook out the window. It landed into the koi pond._

He could literally hear the depression. _Was it ok —_ His writing was cut off as she wrote

 _He told me I should jump off the roof and die, that maybe I'll reincarnate and hopefully get a Quirk finally._

Absolute fury tore through him and he wanted nothing more than to find this Kacchan and beat him down. He hadn't felt this angry in years, but someone was telling _his Soulmate_ to kill herself. He was going to kill that little shit.

 _Don't fucking listen to that asshole. I swear to God…You're worth way more than him…_

If she'd jumped…How would he feel? What would happen to him? Rei flashed through his mind and he shuddered hard.

 _Thank you…I really needed to hear —_

When she was cut off and didn't reply to his frantic replies, he felt at a loss.

"Otou-san, what's wrong?"

"I don't know, Shoto! I don't know! She's not…she's not…!" He felt panic overwhelm him. She wasn't responding. He felt a faint choking sensation and what emotion he could feel was fear and sadness and desperation and-and…

Shoto grabbed his face, looking right at him. "Okaa-san's coming. Breathe, okay? She's…Your Soulmate's fine. She is."

Enji shook his head. " _Something's happening."_

She's not okay. She's not. The depression, the feelings of self-deprecation, even before all this…This suffocating feeling…

 _ **(Was it her? Was it him?)**_

"Enji, what's wrong?"

"Something's happening to Izuku. Something is —"

"TV," he heard Rei order their son and the television was turned on. He was starting to gasp now, but he was breathing easier.

"I don't see anything," Rei murmured but Enji shook his head again. Something was happening and she was involved. "Keep the TV on."

 _ **(This was why having a Soulmate was a horrible idea…)**_

Enji's head was pillowed on Rei's lap while the TV kept going, his son sitting near him. When Fuyumi came home, she saw the trio and joined the group. Enji said nothing when his daughter sat next to his wife, threading her hand comfortingly through his hair. Natsuo only had to peek his head inside the training room before dumping his stuff by the hall's entrance and walking inside, sitting by Shoto and watching the television intently.

Then the television had breaking news and there was something about All Might, some kid named Bakugo, and a sludge villain. He instantly felt like she had something to do with all that for some reason.

He felt the burning sensation on his skin that meant she was writing and he sat up abruptly, accepting the pen Rei handed to him immediately.

 _Sorry about earlier. I was…There was this…_

 _Were you attacked?_ He immediately asked, knowing that news on television had to be connected to her.

 _I was writing to you and crossing under a bridge. There was this sludge villain —he ambushed me and…_

Terror and anger battled in him, and he wanted to track down this villain.

 _I was really scared and he was practically swallowing me up and trying to crawl through my mouth and I couldn't breathe. I thought I was going to die._

The feeling of suffocation earlier caught up to him and though he now knew it was from her, he couldn't help but think that this entire situation with her…the idea of having a Soulmate…

He felt he was suffocating by it himself.

She wrote to him about everything, not even keeping All Might a secret. Though he knew she would've otherwise, had he not been her Soulmate, he felt gratified enough to know that he mattered that much to her that she would keep no secrets from him already.

 _ **(He wondered what she'd do if she knew her Soulmate was him, Number Two Hero and failed mess of a man.)**_

 _Be careful_ was all he could say to that.

 _I will_ she wrote back, drawing a smiley.

 _ **(Enji also wondered what she'd look like smiling for real at him.)**_

* * *

The days were passing again. Izuku kept him up to date on her training with All Might and he felt both jealous and wistful, wishing she'd train with him. She let him know about the way things were going at school, how Kacchan was ignoring her now (but at least wasn't full out bullying her anymore).

She asked him how his family was and asked little things about the others. Sometimes one of or all of his family were around and would even write on his skin to talk to her.

It was like she was already part of the family (and that was too scary).

 _ **(She fit in with him and his family, but did he fit in with her and be accepted by her family?)**_

She told him about UA eventually, and then he was wondering if he should ask her if she wanted him to sponsor her. It would reveal who he was, but it would've happened eventually. But then she told him how she'll be ready to take the exam and how excited she was and if _he_ would be excited and happy for her, and all he could do is be quiet and answer back _yes_ and _yes_.

When she's accepted, they celebrated together by sharing a drink in their respective homes. They're not face to face or together, but it's comforting to know that the other is on the other side of this bond.

 _ **(Maybe a Soulmate can be a good thing.)**_

His son came home from the first day of school with a small smile and told him about a girl with green hair and an infectious smile.

"Her name is Midoriya," Shoto said. "You'd like her."

Enji nodded. "I'm glad you're making friends."

The only friend Shoto had made had been through Enji's skin to a girl that would be family if Enji'd let her in.

 _ **(Enji was still unsure if he wanted to let her in.)**_

Still, he was tempted to ask Shoto if he'd seen Izuku around UA, if his son had met Enji's Soulmate yet. But he doesn't and more time passed by, and even if the USJ incident happened, his son was okay and he knew Shoto was capable of taking care of himself —though he wondered about Izuku's presence and how she was doing, but mostly just glad she hadn't been part of the USJ field trip.

When the day of the Sports Festival arrived, it arrived spectacularly. Shoto pointed out Midoriya, who was beautiful with her wild jungle green hair and peridot green eyes and fire-bright attitude, with lips soft looking even from afar —

Enji shoved those thoughts down because Midoriya was young and not his Soulmate, and he was consumed with guilt for having such thoughts about someone when his Soulmate was somewhere there.

He watched his son, but most of all he watched out for his Soulmate. He can't find her, but his eyes are drawn to Midoriya, who out thinks the competition in the first round, took charge (even if futile) in the second round, and then amazes in the first match up of the third round.

Enji searched her out, because how could he not? She was a perfect rival for his son and maybe could be a compatible companion to Shoto, like Rei would've been if she hadn't of met her Soulmate. Hopefully Midoriya hadn't yet come across hers.

He found her in a hallway, looking distracted as she walked along.

"Midoriya!" he called out, stopping her.

She turned and faced him, peridot eyes wide and questioning, a bit of awe in them at the sight of Enji. He inwardly preened before mentally ridiculing himself.

"E-Endeavor-san! Please to meet you! W-what can I do for you?" she stuttered out.

"My son is your next match up," he said. "I would like for you to fully challenge him and fight to your fullest."

She looked surprised before determination and a familiar fire to his lit up her eyes.

"I definitely plan to, Endeavor-san!"

The spitfire attitude, the wild grin…He felt entranced.

But he just nodded sternly and backed away.

 _ **(His Soulmate was there. What was he doing?)**_

He turned and started to walk away, feeling guilty. He felt for his arm, filching a pen to write to Izuku and apologize for the thoughts he'd entertained, even if briefly.

His situation wasn't like the others, in which it was okay since he and his Soulmate never met —because they've been in constant contact through the years, and had talked and shared things with each other that they'd never had, and even with the gap that is there between them in age and physical distance, they'd found a way to connect to each other through that.

He should respect her enough to be loyal to her, especially when he had a wife and family already.

And unlike everyone else, he knew where Izuku was, could actually literally find and touch her and finally meet —

 _I just met Endeavor! He was really cool up close. And um…handsome._

He froze at the words on his skin before he slowly turned around. He saw Midoriya fixated on her arm, writing on it. He could still feel the burning sensation, letting him know more words were being written onto his skin.

He breathed in deeply and watched his arm, before he too began to write.

 _I'm sorry. I met a girl my son called Midoriya and she was the most beautiful person I'd ever met, and I had thoughts about her that should be for you._

There was silence in that hallway, and when he looked up, he saw she was staring at him in disbelief. His breathing went faster.

"Enji-san?"

"Izuku," he murmured.

He saw her swallow slowly, mouth opening and closing for a few times.

 _ **(This was it. They had finally met.)**_

"You're my Soulmate?" she whispered in disbelief.

" _That's it, Enji. Once you fully acknowledge it, there's no going back."_

But _did_ he really want a Soulmate? After what he'd known about it, after everything he'd seen and felt already, did he really want to go through with this?

 _ **(He watched Rei break down and sob, and sometimes he remembered her staring blankly at her arm, probably willing for words to appear.)**_

 _Did Enji want a Soulmate?_

Izuku shook her head though and took a step back. She made the decision for him.

She turned and fled right as _Yes_ almost fled his lips.

Started 12/13/18— Completed 12/20/18

 **A/n: This was…bittersweet? Lol, it's not a happy Soulmate AU, that's for sure XD I really like this though, so it may become more than a one-shot in the future~ In any case, I hope everyone enjoyed and please remember to review, sweeties!**

* * *

 **Quick Points:**

1\. **EnDeku Discord Invite** : discord dot gg /GFHSFJc

2\. **New BNHA stories** : " **Dokei to Dokei** " (EnDeku Soulmate AU one-shot) and " **Drag Me Down** " (EnDeku ft. fanboy!Enji and Drag Queen!Izuku). Hope you guys check them out and end up enjoying them!


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